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Gilligaaaaaaaan!! Where’s My Straggler???

Okay, so we’re not perfect…

At Interbike, Eurobike and other points abroad and at home.  Several of us here at Surly (including my(rathercharming)self) gave people what we believed to be the ETA’s on many of our new products, that we’ve been talking about and demoing for a couple of months now.

Pretty much all of the ETA’s that we gave out were wrong, for one reason or another.  When we gave them out, we thought they were correct.  As it turns out, we were wrong about that too.  We are sorry for this. (As a point of clarification, when I say we, I mean us at Surly HQ and not our distributors, domestic or abroad)(it’s not their fault).  We are sorry.

Let me say that again.

We are sorry, we suck, we are not perfect and we sumtimes make mistakes. (and by sumtimes I mean often)

Apparently our mistake has made some people out there very very angry.  Again, sorry, our bad.  Not perfect (us).  I know how shitty it is to have well laid plans and then have someone/something/Surly/the universe screw it all up with a big lesson in reminding me that I’m not really in control of anything at all. That lesson sucks.  It comes often, and it comes loudly.  You would think that I would learn. But I don’t.  I just can’t shake the idea that I should be in control, and yet (alas) I am not.

This whole thing has blown up on some forums and some folks email boxes are overflowing.  Personally it’s brought a few things to light that I want to yammer on about. So let the yammering begin. Sorry in advance. (for the yammering)

Yammer 1:  We don’t control the universe and all it’s properties.  If we did, things would probably largely be the same; wherein sometimes great things happen and sometimes terrible things happen.  I mean look at us, you should see the pile of beer cans on my table after a night of D&D. Seriously there are six of us, and my wife has asked on repeated occasions if there were twenty or more. Contrary to what you might think, or what you’ve heard, we’re not perfect and we can’t control every variable. Oh that we could, then we’d have no excuse (other than the mountain of beer).

Yammer 2: From my point of view, it is insane to think that we wouldn’t be selling our bikes to you right now if we could.  We are a business and money helps a whole bunch with the “keeping the lights on” thing.  Also, we’re a bunch of giant nerds who don’t like to wait for things either (though we are often forced to). It’s not a plot (I can see how it might feel/seem like one, but it’s not) and it’s not a conspiracy. I swear.  Of course if it was, that is exactly what I would say to you about it not being one. Let that swim around in your fishbowl.

Yammer 3: I’m not sure what this whole thing has to do with us being giant corporate sell-outs, but if that’s how you want to think of us; that’s okay. There’s really not a whole hell of a lot I can do about that. I’m comfortable with my manhood. I like where we are as a group and I am proud as hell of the bikes we make.

Yammer 4: We are doing the best we can.  Well, really…is anyone every really doing the best they can??  Yes, sometimes they are, and this time that’s us.  It’s important to us that people get to ride our shit, why on earth would it not be?  What could we possibly have to gain? Other than lulling you into a false sense of security only to slowly take over your life through consumer product pamphlets and/or QR codes at some specified date, later in time that lines up with the lost Celtic calendar of Thothlec lord of darkness and buzzards. Also, cuz we’re giant assholes.

Yammer 5 (the final yammer):  If you wanted to buy one of our new bikes, and you don’t want to buy it anymore because you won’t be able to buy it by October the 7th, then probably you shouldn’t buy it in the first place.  If the allure of that bike will wear off so quickly and completely, I’m not sure that having one will change that reality.  We don’t build our bikes for the fickle or for the resale value. We build our bikes to ride and we build them to last. As Dave sometimes says, “you’ll have to get your placebo somewhere else.”

I don’t mean to come off as a complete prick (that’s just the gravy), it’s just that sometimes…no wait….as it turns out, I’m done.

See ya next time.

 

Gern Blanston's avatar

About Gern Blanston

A rider-slash-Surly fan who somehow bounced like a quarter at a drunken college mixer into what he thinks is pretty much the swellest job a fella could have, it is Tyler’s job to determine how Surly should seek attention to its products and itself generally. He has an extensive background in children’s theater, which is, perhaps not surprisingly, a good fit for the marketing manager of this company.

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