Things are happening. Here in MPLS you gotcher Snowball's Chance in Hell: And then you gotcher Stupor Bowl, also right here in the MiniApple. Organizers say: "Once again, the Minneapolis Bicycle Messengers are at it again, organizing the 11th Annual Stupor Bowl alleycat to be held in our fair city on the 1st and 2nd of February, 2008. Last year, depite the starting temprature -2 F, over 300 people braved the cold to race in what has turned into one of North America's biggest and longest running alleycat races." Then there's the Broken Heart Alleycat coming up in Bellingham, WA. Oh, and in April there's the first ever New Zealand Single Speed Championships. Wouldn't want to miss that. I hear it's bee-yootiful there. O.k., that's enough shilling for one day. -----

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Apple-cheeked Demanda, a friend who I would describe as a Scenester (something I doubt she'll be happy about, although I bet she'll dig being mentioned here, which strikes me plainly as scenterism), sends this story, about how to identify and deal with infestations of Hipsters. Viz: "Hipsters are freakishly antisocial; some argue it is genetic. This trait becomes especially magnified in unfamiliar or non-hip environments. So, the last thing you want to do is alienate hipsters further from society than they've already alienated themselves. Here are a few things you must understand before attempting to communicate with hipsters: >Hipsters know more about music than you do. >Hipsters know more about clothing than you do. >Hipsters know more about Charles Bukowski than you do. >Your sense of fashion is “fin” (bad). Embracing these ideas as fact will not put you on the same level as hipsters—that would be ridiculous—but it will let the hipster know that you are keeping it real, which they can respect, sort of." Those of you in colder areas of the northern hemisphere may notice more signs of hipsters in your home at this time of year. Like mice and other pests, hipsters will seek shelter from the cold, finding their way into garages, attics, and basements. Speaking of northern climates, Surly News' unqualified medical correspondent and FNG Warranty Inspections Officer Aaron The Pie Plow has asked that I take a moment to remind everyone of another pesky winter guest, depression. Low sun angle, shorter days, and diets that do not include actual, naturally occuring vitamins can lead to severe, debilitating depression. Get to know the signs, and intervene if necessary. Symptoms of depression include: >Mustache/beard/sideburns >Overcoat >Dour expression >Continued residency in latitudes at or above that of Kenosha, Wisconsin >Drinking the same amount as usual but being less excited about it ************************************************************************************* In actual news, the latest issue of Vancouver's Momentum Magazine arrived in the mailsack yesterday. An excellent example of a bike magazine for the rest of the people who ride bikes (the ones who do not know what next year's XTR looks like, or care), this issue contains a teaser: Momentum will be reviewing longbikes in upcoming issues, longbikes being long wheelbase cargo bikes such as our Big Dummy, the Kona Ute, the Yuba, and the granddaddy that (arguably) started it, the Xtracycle FreeRadical. Keep in mind, they're not merely giving pagespace to acknowledgment of the existence of such bikes, but rather truly testing them, riding them everyday for months, using them for commuting, hauling, and general whatnot, then reporting their findings in the Momentum style, which is to say simple, straightforward, & smart. Get some of that. -----

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Snot-sickles and duck-chickens

A couple of things today: First, it's cold here in Minneapolis. Here's some proof. Hinzey rolled into the Q'b farm today on his LHT with a champeen snot-sickle hangin' off his face mask. Grody. Also, the top tube of his bike was glazed like a donut from his effluent. I don't know about you, but I usually can't swim in that kind of personal goo. Second, to business: We have loads and loads of complete bikes in stock and ready to go. Long Haul Truckers, Steamrollers, and Cross-checks are clogging the shelves and giving Snack heartburn just looking at them. Buy them and make yourself squeal with delight. Truckers will continue to be offered in Utility Blue (which is way cooler than it looks on the web - it's kind of grey/blue and tough.) We will also be offering it in Olive Green (a bit darker than our original Sage, but still awesome, check it.) The Olive will arrive in March. Cross-checks and Steamrollers will remain Black or Misty Mountain Gray and Maroon (chocolatey brown) respectively. Lastly, a Taiwanese riddle: Duck Nick works for Surly. Chicken Nick works for our Taiwan agent. We received word today that Duck Nick has defeated Chicken Nick. Duck Nick was able to keep all the 18 year old scotch on the inside. Chicken Nick was not - a couple of times. This leads us to the following set of axioms (axia?): Given any competition between a chicken and a duck, we're going to pick the duck every time for the following reasons: 1. Ducks can fight on land and on water - that's amphibious yo. Chickens drown. 2. Ducks can fly. Chickens are slaves to gravity. 3. Duck hunting can be fun and challenging because ducks are wily. Shooting chickens, while potentially fun, is no challenge at all. 4. Chickens work for the Man. They sit quietly as we make them into bullion and steal their eggs. Ducks aren't having that shit. 5. If someone yells "DUCK!" at you, they're trying to help you avoid a low flying object. You should thank them. If someone yells "CHICKEN!" at you, you have to kick their ass. So, let's recap. It's cold. Buy a bike. Bet on the duck. -Skip -----

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Big Dummy Geometry Chart

Big Dummy frame geometry Now you have it. -----

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Big and Dumb Big Dummy production is now complete. Thanks to the long ass frame, longer than a tandem, it totally clogged production at the frame and paint shops. As soon as they're boxed up and shipped, they'll be on their way to our warehouse. So we should have them in stock around mid-February. I've written up a huge spew for our website about Big Dummy that can be found HERE -----

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