Japan
United States

Bios

Joel Swenson
Copywriter, Mincer of Words, Butcher of Language

Where did you grow up?
Waconia, MN — shooting location of the movie “Drop Dead Gorgeous”. If you look closely, you might be able to catch me creeping in the background as an extra during the parade scene.

What are your interests/hobbies?
Bikes (duh), cooking and eating good food, cooking and eating shitty food, enthusiastically petting dogs and cats, traveling, metal ranging from heavy to black, the great outdoors (the movie and the real thing), racing cyclocross for some reason, Coors Banquet

Who do you think you are, anyway?
I am the Sweetest of Beefs

Give me your top ten factoids about yourself that others may not realize.

  1. Despite growing up in the land of 10,000 lakes, I can’t swim.
  2. My wife owns more Surly bikes than I do. That’s not to say that I don’t own a lot of Surlys, just that she owns more.
  3. It’s likely that I have more Lycra in my closet than all other Surly employees combined.
  4. I was once on Lemmy’s personal guest list for a Motörhead show.
  5. It’s my lifelong goal to eat at a McDonald’s in every country.
  6. I was a witness at Neal Doughty from REO Speedwagon’s wedding. My signature is on the marriage license and everything.
  7. I find bubblegum to be offensive to all six senses, even the one where you see Bruce Willis.
  8. I’ve been to the end of the rainbow. There is no pot of gold.
  9. Anyone who says they don’t like tacos is a liar and I don’t trust them.
  10. I used to be a bellman at a nice hotel. It afforded me many opportunities to fart in an elevator with celebrities I didn’t like.

Who or what influences your behavior and why?
My wife enables my terrible sense of humor and affinity for bad puns so I guess most of this is her fault.

What would you say your job is around here?
I write the bulk of the Surly propaganda that you read.

One sentence to say what you want to. Go.
Shoot for mediocrity — even if you miss, no one really expected much anyway.